Why is it so hard to just do nothing?

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Happy Sunday and thank you for opening this week’s #TheLifeofJLOWE newsletter! I know we’re a bit late today, but it’s also been a hell of a week for me so forgive me! After a month in Utila, Honduras, I’m back in the US, but the adventure continues because last night I got to watch the Formula 1 Race in Las Vegas!

I’ve been re-adjusting from small island life, but it’s been pretty crazy going from Utila to Las Vegas. The trip to Utila really made me start to recognize how easy it is to be materialistic, and how you don’t need much to survive and be happy. Being in Las Vegas is of course the complete opposite, and the culture shock has been pretty eye opening because of the lifestyle of excess here compared to that which I just lived for a month.

Decompressing after travelling

When I left Utila, I came straight to Las Vegas. In fact, at the time of writing this, I still haven’t even been back home yet to relax and decompress from my month-long trip. And if you know anything about Vegas, you know that this place can be far from relaxing.

Of course I’m grateful to be here in Las Vegas, but at the same time, being here reminds me of the feeling that I had when I would travel in Europe when I studied abroad. I would pack my itineraries for my weekend trips with sightseeing and activities, and always return exhausted.

I learnt from that experience that if you’re planning everything to the T, it’s so important to schedule downtime in your travels because while there’s lots to see and limited time, we also have limited energy and need to recharge.

But that brings me to the title question of this week’s newsletter - why is it so hard to just do nothing?

Why is it so hard to just do nothing?

I’ve been thinking about this since being in Utila, because I had gone there with no plans - really just intending to enjoy the island and my downtime for a few weeks - then ended up in an intensive everyday diving schedule becoming a PADI Divemaster (which I’m so glad I did but still interested in how it played out).

In fact, when I think about downtime, I think about reading books for leisure, doing yoga or even writing my newsletter. These things are enjoyable and and relaxing yes, but they’re still activities. Before writing this newsletter, I laid down and just sat with my thoughts for a bit, and I recognised that for a few minutes there, I was actually kind of doing nothing.

And it felt good!

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Learning how to do nothing as a means to relaxation

In that moment, recognising that I was doing “nothing”, I realised that I had done exactly that many times in Utila on my back porch of my apartment. We had two big chairs facing the lagoon, and oftentimes I’d find myself sitting there, eyes closed, maaaybe listening to Bob Marley, but mostly just enjoying the peace of the moment.

And it always felt great. I had no plans, nothing to do for those few minutes to an hour, just breathing and being present. I honestly am not sure that I had ever done that voluntarily before, or at the very least hadn’t recognised it in the way that I did now.

In fact, I think being here in Las Vegas and having a moment like that, feeling that same peacefulness that I felt in Utila through just doing ‘nothing’ is what triggered me to recognise the importance of that moment. It made me realise that one of the things that I learnt on that trip was how to actually relax, and being back in the US, especially in a place like Las Vegas, that feeling is somewhat out of place.

Thinking about leisure versus relaxation

Something that’s obvious (but I’ll say it anyways) is that things that we do for leisure are oftentimes not things that are relaxing. Whether it’s playing sports, going scuba diving, hanging out with friends or going for a run, these two things are different. Relaxation and downtime I think is so much different, but also equally as important as leisure, and conflating the two doesn’t allow both to take up their own space.

In your time off from your job on the weekends, what are you doing? Are you going to the beach, playing a round of golf, cooking dinner for the family or grabbing drinks at a bar?

All those things are leisure, but they’re not really relaxing. You still have to expend energy doing those things and so you’re not really recharging, which may be why you get back to work still feeling exhausted and like you have to chase after Friday evening again.

Conclusion

So why is it so hard to do nothing?

We live in a culture that glorifies hard work, productivity, work ethic and are oftentimes made to feel guilty about not doing anything. I can almost surely bet that if you just sit and close your eyes and do nothing, you might be asked by a friend or relative, “what the heck are you doing?” because the act of doing nothing as a means to relaxation is not something that is really recognised.

In fact, doing nothing is similar to meditation and mindfulness practices, but even then, people felt it necessary to dictate how to breathe and how to center yourself in order to relax and feel spiritual.

I think as simple as it sounds, you should try to, for a few seconds today or this week, do nothing.

Sit with your thoughts, breathe however you want, close your eyes if you want, but don’t move and don’t engage in any activity. Somewhere between those moments with a slowed heart beat, a few stages before falling asleep, still being fully conscious of what’s going on around you but choosing to be in your own world, is where I you can find some peace, and some real relaxation.

I know I’ll be there, you coming?

Until next Sunday,
Justin